I found this old list while cleaning out the "misc" folder in "My Documents".
Things We Learned From Movies
By Jessica and Courtney
What Women Want – Being electrocuted makes you a more sensitive person…..and it’s hilarious.
Mickey Blue Eyes – Marrying into the Italian mob is both hilarious and dangerous. Forgid aboud id.
Hairspray - Ever since this old world began a woman found out if she shook it she could shake up a man.
The Baxter- Every Baxter is somebody’s leading man. Reading the dictionary is an attractive quality. Hip Hop Dance offs can be dangerous.
Love Comes Softly – If your pioneer husband doesn’t come back from the woods in 20 minutes, he might be dead. Chances are, he is.
Political correctness hadn’t been invented then. But we do love Bob Hope and Bing Crosby! Zanzibar-
Cinderella (the 1960’s version) – Female rights are overrated. Bad teeth can’t prevent you from marrying a prince.
Cinderella (The Brandy version) - one white queen + one black king = an Asian prince? According to this, at least.
Star Wars (A New Hope)- The name “Obi Wan Kenobi” is way cooler than “Old Ben Kenobi”. Seriously, why the not-so-sneaky change, Alec Guinness/Ewan McGregor?
Star Wars (The Empire Strikes Back)- Responding to “I love you” with “I know” is kind of a let down. And no, you don’t really like nice men. Don’t stay outside too long on the ice planet Hoth or your ton-ton will freeze.
Star Wars (The Return of the Jedi) – Falling into the gaping maw of the Sarlacc is probably the WORST way to go. Sorry, Boba Fett.
Star Wars ( The Phantom Menace) – There is a pseudo-scientific way to see if the force is strong with you. Just let Qui-Gon have a little of your blood. Pod Racing is an acceptable hobby for children.
Star Wars (Attack of the Clones)- Star Wars has TERRIBLE relationship dialogue.
Star Wars (The Revenge of the Sith)- First sign of turning to the dark side = domestic violence.
Nic and Nora’s Infinite Playlist- Just say no. To EVERYTHING this movie is and stands for. Ick.
He’s Just Not That Into You- he’s just not that into you……unless he is. You probably won’t know.
Sixteen Candles- Turning sixteen isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. Unless, of course, it is.
The Breakfast Club- This movie has little or nothing to do with breakfasts or clubs. However, it is good for learning that crazy 80’s fast-feet dance Molly Ringwald does. Opposites Attract.
Gone with the Wind- Curtains make great clothes. Just because you went through the civil war doesn’t mean you have to look like it.
Marie Antoinette- Rip Torn is the least French person ever. Living in the 18th century was kind of boring.
The Duchess- Don’t marry terrible old men. And if you do, don’t let your very charming best gal pal stay over all the time. It’s SUCH a bad idea.
The Beautician and the Beast- Fran Drescher plays the same type of character in everything. We’re okay with that, I guess.
Father of the Bride- Hot dog buns and hot dogs are sold in differing quantities.
The Patriot- When you are attacking enemy armies, start with the officers and work your way down.
It’s a Wonderful Life- Apparently, the worst possible thing that can happen to an unmarried woman is to be a librarian……and you should appreciate what you have.
Oceans 11, 12, and 13- It’s better to be a good bad guy than a bad bad guy. Criminal activity is always more socially acceptable if you look like George Clooney.
Catch Me if You Can- Drop out of school, become a master paperhanger! Get caught years later abroad, end up working for the FBI! Check that out. High school drop-out to FBI. No college, no grad school.
Gigi- We can’t even talk about Gigi. That song that goes “Thank heaven for little girls…” Do you know what that’s really about?! This movie is a tribute to creepers everywhere.
The Sound of Music- Even if you are well on your way to being a nun, you can still change your mind and marry a widowed captain with 7 children. Curtains make great play clothes!
High School Musical- Beautiful people are also multitalented in various ways! We’re all stars.
High School Musical 2 – Even upper middle class kids from the
Midwest get oppressed by evil country club tyrants. Why can’t we be friends?
High School Musical 3- Picking a college is hard. Prom is the night of nights. Breaking out into a choreographed graduation dance is proper and natural.
Head over Heels- With enough makeup, anyone can be a model! Always find out if the guy you’re dating is an undercover FBI agent.
Grease- Apparently, abandoning your morals and wearing tight fitting clothing is a great way to end the school year!
Just Friends- Forgiveness is more than saying sorry. Catching your private plane on fire does not mean you’re being punk’d.
27 Dresses- Men who don’t believe in marriage may, indeed, believe in marriage. Maybe they just haven’t met Katherine Heigl….or you.
December Boys- Daniel Radcliffe has a monopoly on teen angst.
Easter Parade- Fred Astaire is forever young.
Funny Girl- Don’t marry a French professional gambler. Or any kind, really. You’re asking for it if you do.
is a place where dreams come true….if you can talk fast enough to keep every one confused. Dolly- New York
On The Town- Consider a career as a singing sailor.
Thoroughly Modern Millie- So sad to be all alone in the world. Don’t pay taxi drivers with checks. Acrobatics is a useful way to defeat the bad guys.
Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day- If three men want you, choose the one who actually loves you (and is Lee Pace with a British accent). Also, if middle age finds you loveless and unemployed, you just might be able to find a guy like Cieran Hinds….so don’t give up the ship.